Kulemba malumbiro anu enieni a ukwati kungakhale ntchito yovuta, koma sizomwe zimakhala zovuta ngati zikuwoneka. Pano pali zosavuta zisanu ndi chimodzi zomwe mungatsatire kuti mulembe malumbiro anu a ukwati.
Malangizo Olembera Malumbiro Anu Achikwati
- Onetsetsani kuti aliyense ali pa tsamba limodzi. Lankhulani ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu wam'tsogolo ndi mtsogoleri wanu ndipo onetsetsani kuti aliyense ali bwino ndi malumbiro ake a ukwati . Zipembedzo zina zimafuna kuti mugwiritse ntchito mawu ovomerezeka, pamene ena angakuloleni kuti mulembe nokha, malinga ngati mutchula mawu ena. Mufunanso kuonetsetsa kuti wokondedwa wanu akufuna kutero. Pamene iwe uli pa izo, sankhani limodzi ngati mukufuna kulemba limodzi la malumbiro aukwati omwe munganene, kapena ngati mukufuna kulemba payekha.
- Yankhani mafunso ophweka. Ndi nthawi ya kuntchito. Khalani pansi pamalo opanda papepala ndi pensulo ndikuyankha mafunso awa. Ngakhale ngati simukuganiza kuti yankho lanu lidzatha pa malumbiro anu a ukwati, tengani nthawi yolemba. Zingakuthandizeni pamapeto pake. Ngati mutakumana ndi mlembi, choyamba yesani kupuma pang'ono. Ngati mukukumanabe ndi vuto, yesetsani kuyankha mayankho mu tepi ya tapepala, ndikulola maganizowo kuyenda momasuka.
- Kodi chinthu chofunika kwambiri pa munthu yemwe mukufuna kukwatira ndi chiyani?
- Kodi mudadziwa liti kuti mudakondana / mukudziwa kuti munthuyu ndiye amene mukufuna kumukwatira?
- Kodi ukwati umatanthauza chiyani kwa inu? Nchifukwa chiyani mukufuna kukhala munthu wokwatira?
- Kodi chinthu chofunika kwambiri chimene mukufuna kulonjeza kwa mnzanuyo ndi chiyani? Kodi ndi lonjezo liti lomwe mukufuna kwambiri kumva kuchokera kwa iwo? (Mwachitsanzo, zingakhale zofunikira kwa inu kuti mulonjeze kuti mudzawalemekeza nthaŵi zonse kapena mungafune kuti iwo alonjeze kukhulupirika kwawo kwamuyaya.)
- Nchiyani chidzasintha pa ubale wanu mutakwatirana? Kodi chidzakhala chiyani chomwecho?
- Kodi ndi chikumbu chiti chomwe mumakonda kwambiri cha mnzanuyo?
- Pamene mudali wamng'ono, kodi munalota tsiku laukwati wanu kapena mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu wam'tsogolo? Kodi masomphenyawa akugwirizana bwanji (kapena ayi) ndi wokondedwa wanu?
- Fufuzani akatswiri. Tengani nthawi kuti muwerenge kupyolera mu malumbiro osiyanasiyana aukwati, komanso ndime za ndakatulo, nkhani zachikondi, ndi kulembedwa kotchuka za chikondi . Sindikizani zomwe mumakonda, ndipo onetsani mavesi omwe amalankhula nanu.
- Ikani zonse palimodzi. Bwererani ku mawu omwe munalemba kale, ndipo onetsani mavesi omwe mungafune kuphatikizapo malumbiro anu a ukwati. Ino ndi nthawi yokonzekera zinthu ndikusankha bwino kwambiri zinthu zonse zomwe muyenera kugwirira ntchito. Yesani kutenga ndemanga kapena ziwiri kuchokera ku mabuku, kuwonjezera chiganizo chimodzi kapena ziwiri kuchokera ku mayankho ku mafunso omwe ali pamwambawa, ndi kumaliza ndi lumbiro-chiganizo chomwe chimayamba "ndikulonjeza" kapena "ndikulonjeza". Mwachitsanzo, munganene kuti: "Mary, monga ndakatulo Rilke adanena, 'Ichi ndi chozizwitsa chimene chimachitika nthawi zonse kwa iwo omwe amakondadi. Ndiwe wowolowa manja, wachikondi, wosadzikonda, ndikudziwa. Ndinayamba kukukondani nthawi yomwe ndinayamba kukuwonani ndi mwana wanu wamkazi ndikumupatsa ulemu ndikukupatsani inu nonse. Agawane chikondi chako ndi ine, ndipo ndikufika pokalamba pafupi ndi iwe Maria, lero ndikusankha iwe kukhala mkazi wanga ndikukulonjeza kukukonda, kukulemekeza, kukusamalira, ndikukhala wokhulupirika kwa iwe, kuyambira lero komanso kwa moyo wathu wonse. "
- Ngati izi sizinagwire ntchito ... Yesani kudzaza mndandanda mu malumbiro ophweka kwambiri:
(Dzina la wokondedwa wanu), ndinuwe (bwenzi lapamtima, chikondi chenicheni chokha, chimene ine ndikufuna kuti ndigwiritse ntchito moyo wanga wonse ndi, etc.) Masiku ano, ndikukutengerani kuti mukhale wanga (mkazi, mwamuna, mkazi wokwatira mwalamulo kapena mwamuna, wokondedwa naye, ndi zina zotero) Ndikukulonjezani kuti ndidzakhala (wokhulupirika, woyenera kukhulupilira, woyenera chikondi chanu, mnzanu wokondedwa, etc.) Ndikulonjeza (kukulemekezani, kukukondani, kukukondani, kulemekeza iwe, kuseka ndi iwe, kulira nawe, kukuthandizira pa zolinga zanu, ndi zina zotero), (onetsani apa kutalika kwa lumbiro lanu, mwachitsanzo, olemera, osauka, odwala ndi odwala, malinga ngati ife tonse adzakhala ndi moyo.) - Chitani, Chitani, Chitani. Choyamba, yesani kuwerenga zomwe mwalembera mokweza kwa mnzanu wodalirika kapena membala. Mwamunthu, munthu uyu adzakhala munthu wolemba bwino, ndi wina yemwe amadziwa ubale wanu. Angakhale ndi malingaliro abwino kwa inu, kapena kuchita zosavuta kuziwerenga mokweza kukuthandizani kudziwa malo omwe mungasinthe. Mukagwira ntchito yomaliza, yesetsani kuŵerenga nokha kuti mukhale otetezeka. Ngati mungathe, yesani kuloweza pamtima. Koma kaya mulowerere bwino kapena ayi, onetsetsani kuti mukulemba malumbiro anu pa khadi lolembera kalata (ndipo mupatseni buku lapadera kwa mwamuna wabwino kapena mtsikana waulemu !) Kotero kuti mitsempha sichidzasokoneza ntchito yanu yonse.